superhero

It's weird, because ... I can't write this morning, and I keep thinking that I should be writing all the time. It's psychologically strange, to know that I'm going to start working on the weekend again, it makes me tired. I really want the money, though. I just want to go home and eat junk food, and not do anything.

But maybe ... it's just hard to live life, sometimes. It's like I don't want to do anything, because I feel really tired, and I know I'm not going to have time to rest.

I'm interested, in the way we drift into ... despair, would you call it? Drift into the end of our lives.

I really want to rest. I want to live a life, where I don't have to do anything anymore. Meaning, I don't want to work, I don't want to have debt. But mostly, I don't want to have to struggle with other people. Is that too much to ask for? I want to not have to work, to only do the work I want to do, because I enjoy it. I really want everything on my own terms. Is that the ultimate in selfish, or is it simply natural? Do we all deserve happiness? Is suffering just a part of human nature?

I'm interested in how we make compromises, and we slowly ... drift to the end of our lives. Or even when you look at our chi. We get older and we ... die. Do we only have a certain amount of energy available? Are we doomed, after that?